Tuesday, November 13, 2007
I think it was meant as a generous gesture.
So why do I feel disturbed rather than grateful?
I guess sometimes we can’t stop the urge to question and be suspicious of other people’s motives and intentions. It’s just unfortunate though how sometimes the purest and sincerest of intentions are tarnished and put to waste just because we chose to be believe otherwise. Blame it on human nature. Blame it on our inner CSI. Maybe it’s some sort of coping and defense mechanism that we use to shield us from the potential hurt and pain and not to mention the river of tears that come along with it.
After all, the name of the game is survival of the fittest. It’s a dog eat dog world where every man is for himself. These days it’s hard to distinguish the real ones from the fakers. It’s hard to determine whether someone is just faking it or not. You have to learn to be sly and cunning – but fair. Kailangan talaga madiskarte ka otherwise it’s game over.
Maybe I should just take it for what it is – nothing more, nothing less. No underlying meaning. No hidden agenda. Nothing in exchange. Perhaps I was just thinking too much. Maybe I was just overanalyzing things. Maybe I was just overreacting. I really don’t know anymore. I can’t trust my gut feel on this one as I’ve previously mentioned it doesn’t have much of a track record so to speak.
As much as I want to be left out, I guess I’m left with no other choice but to start playing the game (that others are playing). However, I’m not going to resort to any dirty and underhanded tricks - in as much as my conscious mind can control. Sorry guys, I’m going to play clean and fair. In the meantime though, all that you're getting from me is benefit of the doubt until such time that I've strategized and sorted out my game plan.
So why do I feel disturbed rather than grateful?
I guess sometimes we can’t stop the urge to question and be suspicious of other people’s motives and intentions. It’s just unfortunate though how sometimes the purest and sincerest of intentions are tarnished and put to waste just because we chose to be believe otherwise. Blame it on human nature. Blame it on our inner CSI. Maybe it’s some sort of coping and defense mechanism that we use to shield us from the potential hurt and pain and not to mention the river of tears that come along with it.
After all, the name of the game is survival of the fittest. It’s a dog eat dog world where every man is for himself. These days it’s hard to distinguish the real ones from the fakers. It’s hard to determine whether someone is just faking it or not. You have to learn to be sly and cunning – but fair. Kailangan talaga madiskarte ka otherwise it’s game over.
Maybe I should just take it for what it is – nothing more, nothing less. No underlying meaning. No hidden agenda. Nothing in exchange. Perhaps I was just thinking too much. Maybe I was just overanalyzing things. Maybe I was just overreacting. I really don’t know anymore. I can’t trust my gut feel on this one as I’ve previously mentioned it doesn’t have much of a track record so to speak.
As much as I want to be left out, I guess I’m left with no other choice but to start playing the game (that others are playing). However, I’m not going to resort to any dirty and underhanded tricks - in as much as my conscious mind can control. Sorry guys, I’m going to play clean and fair. In the meantime though, all that you're getting from me is benefit of the doubt until such time that I've strategized and sorted out my game plan.
0 comments:
Post a Comment