Money Talks

Monday, February 21, 2005

Do we always need to hand out extra money under the table to get things done? Do we always have to resort to shady deals in order to get what we want? If this is the case then I don’t think we’ll ever get things done – efficiently and effectively. They say money is the root or source of all evil. As what I’ve learned in one of my religion classes, money in itself isn’t really the root or source of all evil. Man’s greed and lust for money is what makes it evil. I went to the Mandaluyong City Hall this afternoon to have my NBI and police clearance processed as it is part of work's requirements. My sister and a colleague got theirs 4 days after so I couldn’t quite understand why mine would take at least a week to process. I need to pass work’s requirements as soon as possible because we’re on a very tight schedule. So when my driver told me that one of the persons-in-charge could get me my NBI clearance the very next day in exchange for an additional P250 (ang dugas! and then they have the nerve to change it to 2 days grrr!), I wasn’t so sure what to do. I was thinking I needed my clearance as soon as possible but on the other hand I didn’t want to give them the benefit of getting the better of me. I’ve always condemned the way our country’s systems work. Our country never progresses primarily because of rampant graft and corruption among government officials – from the executive branch to the legislative branch and on to the judicial branch. And just recently, I’ve experienced first hand a fraction of how corruption works at the lowest levels of government. How much more kaya at the higher levels of the government hierarchy? I can just imagine how massive graft and corruption is at the higher ranks. Just the thought of it makes me shudder. As much as I vehemently condemn any form of bribery or corruption, I was admittedly in one of my weakest moments to say the least. I gave in to bribery to save myself the hassle and so that I can pass my work requirements on time. I felt guilty afterwards as if I were such an unlawful citizen of this country. I even felt disappointed with myself for allowing myself to be part of their fraudulent activities. I felt so exasperated with the persons-in-charge. As obedient taxpayers of this country, we duly deserve to have access to well-functioning government services. As for me, I momentarily became one of those people whom I’ve always denounced. It’s those people who are more than willing to pay who make corruption a lot worse than it already is. For now, I’m guilty as charged. The next time something like this happens again, I’ll make sure that I’ll do the talking. I'll give them a piece of my mind and if that doesn't work, I'll call the attention of their supervisors. And if all else fails, I think I'll pray for them nalang (hehe).

* Off-topic: Good news is I found my driver’s license na! I've been praying to St. Anthony ever since. He never fails me talaga. Yahoo! =)

Jackpot!

Friday, February 18, 2005

YES! Yes that I was accepting their job offer and yes because I would like to think that I have finally found a very good job although I’m expecting it to be very difficult and challenging as well. What seems surreal is having to leave for Hong Kong so soon and live independently for 5 whole months (yikes!). I’ve always wanted a change in environment anyway so I guess this is the perfect opportunity. But of course if given the chance, I would have chosen a different country (hehe). Just the same, this is BIG for me. The whole thing is new to me. It’s something that I wasn’t really expecting to come my way. In my dreams…maybe but never did I imagine that I will actually score something as big as this (not that it’s a big-time job hehe). Well anyway, at least in my standards it’s considered big deal already. The opportunities that the company is offering us are just too good to be true. However just like all things, not everything is always sugar coated. Of course, with the opportunities comes hard work. I know that I’ll have to work extra hard this time otherwise they’ll have me pack my bags and worse, they’ll have me pay a large sum of money for the bond. I really hope that everything will work out just fine and that I can do it. Since work hasn’t officially started yet, I’m going to in the meantime enjoy my so-called award-winning slash grand slam moment.

Did I hit the jackpot this time? I certainly hope so.

One More Try

Thursday, February 17, 2005

And the saga (of my future career) continues on…

I received a call this morning and I was scheduled for another interview early this afternoon with their MIS person. Yes, the one person who supposedly can and will technically determine once and for all whether or not this job is for me. In short, the fate of my future lies in her hands. You see, they still have some hesitation because I mentioned from my previous interviews that I’m really not the numbers/quantitative type of person. At least I was honest about it. What's important is I’m always willing to learn and very persistent at that! ;)

At one point in the interview, I was asked to analyze the given graph and table on the spot. I was literally petrified but of course I still had to stay cool like as if it was no big deal to me (hehe). It's a good thing though I’m usually calm under pressure. Phew! I’m so relieved I was able to pull that one off (now I ought to give myself a well-deserved pat on the back heehee!). From the interview, it turns out that I had the wrong job description in mind. It turned out that, aside from the analytics and whole numbers thing, the job will involve a lot of programming which by the way I have no background on (not even the basics!). The analysis part I think I can deal with especially with more practice but the programming part….I really don’t know. But with proper training, I'm pretty sure some way some how I can deal with it naman din. However, I’m not so sure if it’s exactly what I want to do for the next 2 years or so. It's a matter of whether or not it really interests me. I feel confused right now. I think the 5 months training in Hong Kong under the tutelage of a Yale doctorate makes the job a whole lot more attractive and makes it a little too good to pass. More so I get to further advance my education and the new environment is a fresh change. I think we'll also be given a sizeable amount for our allowance which is a plus. Really…I don’t know what to do. I’ve always been hard working in school so the learning aspect is not that much of a problem. What concerns me right now is whether or not I’ll be happy with the job in the long run. *(3:50 pm)

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During dinner, I got a call again. I have another interview tomorrow. Supposedly it’s to finalize things daw. So what's the state of my mind right now? My mind’s clearer now after talking to my dad. I feel more encouraged. I feel surer now. I’ve decided to take the job if and when I will be accepted. Maybe it’s about time for me to undertake changes in my life. I’ve always wanted some change anyway. I think I need it. So now that opportunity has already presented itself, why not take it? Perhaps change will even be good for me. Wish me luck.

50/50

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

50/50 chance. I earnestly feel that I have a 50/50 chance of making the final cut. Although I wasn’t super confident before the interview, I felt fairly comfortable with my position. Now that the “important” interview is over and done with, I’m feeling more uncertainty. I feel doubtful with my overall performance and disposition. The interview was surprisingly short compared to yesterday’s 9am to 12pm and to the other girl’s “important” interview just yesterday (hehe I inadvertently saw her time-in and time-out in the log book). Is a short interview (let's say a little over 15 minutes) good or bad? The possible explanation I can come up with is maybe they’ve already made up their minds – that is, either they’re so sure they want me in already (wishing!) or they’re so sure they want me out (hehe). It can actually go both ways when you think of it, makes sense right? Although there were a couple of instances when I wished I could have answered differently (so what else is new? hehe), I don’t think I made that bad an impression on the general manager. In fact, I was very early for the interview. Ironically, I wasn’t so sure whether or not I wanted the position yesterday. I was even nervously thinking what if they pick me? (hehe feeling ba?) I was thinking then it would mean more pressure and confusion for me to make a decision. I wasn't really 100% wanting to be accepted talaga (tsk! tsk!...I know bad, bad, bad me). And to think, my family (especially my mom and dad) was even so eager and excited for me. So as not to get their hopes up, I reminded them that nothing’s definite yet. I’m not yet a shoo-in and that I still have an interview with the general manager. I don’t want to build or hype everything all up only to disappoint them in the end. So now that the supposedly important interview is over, I really do not know where I stand. I don’t want to stress myself too much and go through the typical what if’s and could-have-been’s scenarios. I’ll just have to wait for their call and if I don’t get "the call" then I guess I’ll have to just try my luck elsewhere or maybe something bigger is waiting for me in the wings (hehe yeah right!). On the lighter side, I'd get to join all family activities and won't be left behind if and when they decide to go abroad this coming Holy Week or summer and lastly, I won't miss out on the new seasons of all my favorite TV shows (hehe). However, now that I really think about it…I actually want the job. I'm now willing to take that risk. I'm willing to take that plunge. It's funny how when we can’t have something, all the more we want it; and all those times that we had it, we didn’t want it; and when we thought we had it, we actually didn’t. Interestingly and so frustratingly boggling are life’s ironies but then again maybe it's just me.

In the Pressure Cooker

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

I got an unexpected call last week from the Philam Group of Companies for a management associate position. The position was supposed to be 1 year training some time in May or June where we will be assigned to different divisions in one of their affiliate companies here in the Philippines. Although I’m not that interested in the insurance business per se, I just thought of checking it out since I had all the time in the world anyway - doing nothing (haha!). So I took the test and interview last Friday without any pressure and expectations. The test wasn’t really overly difficult for my brain to manage or handle (hehe). The interview, on the other hand, was surprisingly quite comprehensive. While I wasn’t totally prepared for it, I don’t think I made a total fool out of myself either. To my surprise, I got a call back just yesterday for a professional associate position from AIG which from my understanding is the parent or partner (I’ll have do research on that first hehe) company of the Philam Group and is one of the largest worldwide. This time the position was a little different from the first one in the sense that it would require 5 months training in Hong Kong along with 2 more representatives in the Philippines and other representatives in Taiwan, Thailand and Hong Kong. Further conditions include that we cannot leave Hong Kong by all means for the entire duration of the training (meaning: even if it would be at my expense or even only for a weekend – a perfect example would be me wanting to attend my cousin’s wedding in April which I was looking forward to since last year). Another condition is we’re required to work for the company for at least 18 months after the training (that's one and half years!). If we break that bond, we’ll have to pay a huge sum (believe me when I say it's huge, it's HUGE). They’re investing a little over a million pesos on us so who could blame them right? Here's the biggest catch...we'll have to leave in a week's time (March 2 to be exact) since training will officially start in February 21. Hello?! it's such short notice to condition myself to leave the luxuries and comforts of home (hehe). After two interviews and an essay this morning, I was scheduled for a final interview with the general manager of AIG tomorrow. Actually, I almost didn't make the cut na because after hearing that the training and job was going to be dealing with a whole lot of "numbers" and analytics, I couldn't lie to the interviewer and tell him that I was a big fan of numbers (hehe). Although I'm partial to the qualitative side of things, I was still interested one way or the other. But when he asked me if I was hugely interested, I couldn't tell him straight that "I was HUGELY interested." After a call from my sister and her knocking some sense into me that the job position was too good an opportunity to pass, I made bawi in the essay and the following interviews after that. I guess tomorrow’s the moment of truth. To say that I’m confused right now is an understatement. I really don’t know what to do. I can’t decide. Ever since choosing to study in DLSU, this certainly tops my list of having to make major decisions. I know that this is sort of life altering and will certainly determine my life's direction whether in a good or bad way for the next two years or even more. Well, nothing’s definite yet. Heck, I’m not yet even accepted. I still have one very important interview to hurdle tomorrow so I don’t want to jump the gun. I guess I'll just have to wait and see whatever happens tomorrow...only then will I be able to fully decide.

Post Graduation Thoughts

Monday, February 14, 2005

After exactly 4 years and 2 terms in DLSU, I finally graduated with flying colors last Saturday (February 5, 2005). I feel a strong sense of achievement that I was able to successfully complete my education and to top it all of, graduate honorable mention. It truly feels great to have come to the realization of a goal that I’ve worked so hard for. And now as I graduate and move on to (*Ahem!*) GREATER things, I can’t help but feel a surge of mixed emotions. I feel some sort of happiness. I guess that's self-explanatory. I feel some sort of sadness that I’m officially leaving college life behind (and with that…I hope that I’ll stay connected or in close contact with friends I’ve made along the way). I feel some sort of confusion as to the direction that I want to take. At this point, I do not really know what I want to do. As of the meantime, my game plan consists of taking the backseat (translation: I don’t want to pressure myself too much and I don’t want to rush things and make rash decisions that I’ll later on regret) and rather than making things happen for myself, I’ll just wait for opportunity to present itself. I know this may not sound like a smart game plan at all but base from experience, sometimes forcing things to happen creates too much expectations and false hopes. So I’ll just take things nice and slow and take it one day at a time. I feel some sort of excitement of what’s ahead of me. I can only hope for bigger and better things to come. I guess I can say that more or less I’m prepared for whatever the future has in stored for me. No matter how different I’d like some things to have been or for the way some things to have turned out and no matter how much altering or changing I want to make, at this point I can only be thankful for being so blessed in spite and despite of.

Partners in Crime: Mae, Me, Anne, Pan (DLSU Graduation in PICC)


In all our glory (hehe): Tin, Joj, Pan, Ga, Me, Anne, Kathy, Mae

Zip It!

Saturday, February 12, 2005

As rational (and intellectual – I hope!) human beings, we always have a point to make whether pertaining to relevant or trivial matters. It’s good that we all have our own opinions and thoughts to share. The dilemma though lies in our stubbornness and inflated egos. I really don't see myself as the confrontational type. More often than not, I'd be subtle and indirect unless it reaches a point that it becomes too much to bear or handle already. I’m usually the type who would calmly reason my way out of an issue or subject matter that I feel strongly about. However, it seems to me that sometimes it’s best to just hold my piece; that is, to keep my mouth shut lest of getting myself into deep shit and more trouble. Why not simply save myself the time and energy for more productive matters rather than waste it all to futile arguments and debates? I’m sick and tired of endless arguments and bickering that fall into deaf ears and “closed minds.” It’s quite exhausting to continuously argue and debate about the same old issue or subject matter that seemingly drags on and on without any resolution. It frustrates me to see persons who so stubbornly refuse to keep an open mind or the least, listen. If only cooler heads prevail then we could all understand each other a whole lot more and find a better way to compromise. Sometimes I see no point of reasoning and arguing anymore since it would only lead to bitter fights and bigger misunderstandings. Therefore, I deem it best to keep my mouth shut for as long as I can take it and for as long my patience can stretch the extra mile.