2010!

Thursday, December 31, 2009

Last day of the year...

Like always, life is filled with hellos and goodbyes...

Say goodbye to...

old grudges,

sad memories,

bad habits,

painful heartaches,

bitterness and anger...

THROW ALL THAT AWAY.

Let go. Keep on moving forward.

Forgive and forget. 

Live and learn.

Say hello and make space for...

new beginnings,

new friends,

new hope,

new loves,

and second chances!

Keep the good things in your life close to you. Let go of those that make you sad. Life's too short to be angry, bitter or sad. Laugh more, love lots and open your heart to new possibilities and surprises. 

Finally, it's the last day of the year. I'm so over 2009. Nonetheless, I thank God for all of 2009's lessons. I've learned tremendously. And so, I'm now leaving 2009 behind - all of it in its entirety; walang labis, walang kulang, no more, no less. I'm hoping that 2010 will be kinder to me and that it's going to be a better, if not one of the best years for me. It's time to start making things happen.

Happy New Year to Everyone! Here's to a funtabulous year ahead for all of us. Cheers. :)

Self Indulgence

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Ayayay I splurged on shoes today. Well I'd like to think of it as more of an investment, hehe. Before anything else, can I just say that a good pair of pumps is a rare find these days. See me and my sister made a deal - I'll buy my Stella Luna only if she buys her Steve Madden. Oh well it's not as if we self indulge all the time. Minsan lang naman and I think I've worked hard for it. What with a whole year's worth of sweat and high blood?! I think I've earned it and that's even an understatement. Yeees. Yun yun eh. Haha. It's actually my first time to do Christmas shopping for myself. Buti nalang my horoscope kinda agrees with me. Lol.

'09 Christmas Wish

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Dear Santa, 

I want an Edward Cullen too. Please prioritize. Thanks.

P.S. For your consideration, I've been nice. I think. Does that help my case? 

Love, Candice

2009.

Monday, December 14, 2009

Today is officially my last working day for the year. Wow whatever happened to 2009? Pffft. Needless to say, 2009 hasn't been exactly good to me. Even so, I look back still with much gratitude for the year that was because I know in spite of everything, I am still blessed. And so, I am looking forward to 2010 with much faith, hope and positivity. No more expectations, steady vibes lang all the way and maybe then life starts coming together and things will start falling into place.

As a takeaway to 2009...

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."

Zoned Out

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Sometimes we're better off not knowing. Ignorance can be bliss.

Seeing Red

Saturday, October 31, 2009

No more justifications. No more excuses. It is what it is. How can you not ignore the red flags? It's quite simple. You don't. You can't be blinded by your emotions and feelings.

I'm slowly coming to terms with reality that it is just not meant to be. 

Slowly but surely, I'm getting there. Acceptance is key.

Disappointed

Friday, October 30, 2009

Where have the good guys gone? It seems impossible to come across one these days.

Just a thought, should the girls start being bad as well? We can play your game too, you know. 

People Change

Monday, October 26, 2009

Change is inevitable.

The only thing constant in this world is change.

We all know that.

Yeah, people change too.

It's so common sense but why does it still hurt us so bad when someone changes on you? The feeling is real. It sucks to be on the receiving end. You want to try and work things out but why bother if the other person doesn't seem to even care?

Tough life.

BFF

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Best friends who are in love. Now that...I think is the best kind of love.

Two is Better than One

Find someone who isn't afraid to admit that he misses you. Someone who knows that you're not perfect, but treats you as if you are. Someone whose biggest fear is losing you. Someone who can never get enough of you, always excited to see you, to touch you and be with you. Someone who gives his heart completely. Someone who shows consistent love. Someone who says I love you and means it, and shows it. Last but not the least, find someone who you wouldn't mind waking up with you in the morning, seeing your wrinkles, and your gray hair but still loves you just the same. Find someone who, even through it all, still falls in love with you all over again. 

Sounds too idealistic, impossible even but I'm hopeful that this kind of love is still possible.

Random Thoughts

Saturday, October 17, 2009

1. Got pulled over by the MMDA last night. Dumaan kasi kami sa bus lane. We do that everyday because the right most lane aka bus lane is always faster. So ayun...finally nahuli na rin kami hehe! Since our driver was doing such a lousy job getting into the good graces of the MMDA person, I started apologizing that it was I who told our driver to pass through the bus lane. I explained that I was already late for dinner (kuno) hehe. He bought it and let us off the hook. So remember, it pays to be nice! And of course, gotta start following the traffic rules na hehe.

2. It is official. We are transferring to the Fort early next year. I'm neutral. However, an officemate turned friend of mine is resigning should the move take place. :( 

3. Someone at the office (from a different department) jumped off the roof yesterday. He was just 27. Grabe. I've always believed that no matter how tough the going gets, taking one's life should never be an option. Read: Never. It's hard to fathom how a person can be so hopeless that the only thing left for him is to take his own life. I don't know him personally but I feel sad for his family, his friends, colleagues and his girlfriend.

4. I was having a random conversation with a friend about day to day stuff and I was kinda surprised by something he said. He told me this, "You're an attractive lady. Why do you think guys won't be attracted to you? You just have to put yourself out there." Thanks for believing in my invisible charms. Lol. Yeah right.

5. No more G1 and G2. It's unfair to keep them around just for the sake of. We're just going to waste each other's time if ever.  Got this from someone else's twitter: "Love when you're ready. Not when you're lonely."

6. The Ugly Truth is very entertaining. It's really cute and funny. I super enjoyed myself. 

7. I'm loving Alicia Keys's Doesn't Mean Anything. Nice song.

8. I'm going to stop caring if only to make our friendship work. Back to being kebs it is...

CCSA

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Dear God,

The truth is there are lots of people in the world yet all I need is one. All I'm asking is just one honest to goodness guy, someone who would be man enough to prove to me that guys aren't all the same. Is that too much to ask?

Love,

Candice

Hello Sunshine

Sunday, October 04, 2009

The sun is finally out. There's a slight breeze in the air too. Nice. It feels like a Sunday now. It's a beauuuuutiful day today. Looking forward to better days ahead...

Pay It Forward

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

I volunteered today and it felt good. As Filipinos, the Bayanihan spirit is something that we should take pride in. If only we'd all pay it forward in whatever way we can then we can definitely turn things around. I hope I made a difference today.

Wrong Send

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Shoot wrong send. I hate it when that happens. Worse part is, I didn't even know I sent the wrong message to the wrong person. I only knew about it when the person actually had the balls to ask/confront me about it. Oh crap. What do I do, right? Shempre nagpakahonest na ako. So now the cat is out of the bag and we're not exactly feeling friendly towards each other anymore. Surprisingly though, I'm not worried at all. In fact, I feel kinda unaffected. He has been acting like a jerk anyway. Therefore, I think the distance should do me good. I'm allergic to jerks. Turn off.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

As tweeted by Dj Mo Twister...

"Everyone, seriously, kuya Mo talking here. At least once in your life...EXPERIENCE A GREAT LOVE STORY. Not in the movies, live one."

Inspired

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

I got the chance to attend Jim Lafferty's talk on Work-Life Effectiveness this afternoon. Jim Lafferty is P&G's soon to be retiring CEO. He is a good speaker with lots of interesting stories to share and experiences to learn from. I am touched. Cheesiness aside, I was even close to tears. I recommend everyone to attend his talk too - just to put life in proper perspective. I feel inspired now.

Side notes:

1. I'm swearing off Starbucks for the whole week. No more Starbucks for me until further notice - for the benefit of my health and wallet! Hehe.

2. Tomorrow's going to be a packed day. It's probably going to last until month end. Tons of work as in lots of deliverables/rush items. So what else is new? Finishing a ton of work the last two weeks only meant MORE work for me. At the office, when it rains...it floods. Buti nalang inspired na ako ngayon c/o Jim Lafferty. Lol.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Benches and pedestals aside hehe, I've been really productive the last two weeks despite my being a one woman team at the office. I gotta give myself a pat now hehe. And to top it all of, today, I finally got back to playing badminton again. Woohoo. It's been a little over a month since we last played. The challenge is actually dragging my lazy ass to play but once you get to the courts, it's not naman nakakatamad. Sarap maglaro rin talaga. It's actually a good way to be fit more than anything else. Now the next challenge is for me to keep this up week after week.

Busog

Wednesday, September 09, 2009

I thoroughly enjoyed my dinner albeit it was just all me and my lonesome self. I had steak for dinner and Haagen Daz ice cream for dessert. Yummy. Thanks to Clarisse for marinating the steak. She tried to spice things up a bit by adding leeks to our usual marinate. It worked for me. I liked how it made the steak taste different. And of course, I love my coffee and strawberry ice cream. As recommended by Clarisse, I added Hersheys chocolate chips/bits (i.e., used for baking cookies) to my ice cream. Sarap and really good combo especially with the coffee ice cream. I recommend!

Little Things

Tuesday, September 08, 2009

It's nice to know that, other than family, I'm on somebody else's speed dial. Nakakataba ng puso talaga for lack of better English translation hehe. I got an unexpected call from someone today. He had good news and he just wanted to share his happiness. He trusts me daw. O ha. It feels so good to share in the happiness and triumphs of a friend. I'm genuinely happy for him that things are going his way right now.

But! I can't be quick to assume though. Who knows I might have been the 100th person on his call list diba? Lol. 

Saturday, September 05, 2009

Another long weekend to look forward to...

Yahoo! :)

Me like spur of the moment non-working holiday declarations. 

So there goes my incognito plan now...I don't think I can hide anymore. Ayayay. Good luck to me.

Random Thoughts

Thursday, September 03, 2009

1. I love Haagen Dazs ice cream. Saaarap. How can one not like ice cream?! Tell me. Tell me! Okay fine...medyo OA na. Hehe.

2. Buffet tomorrow at Makati Shang's Circles. Wahooo! Special 50% discount kasi but unfortunately, breakfast is not included. Sayang I was looking forward pa naman to having breakfast at Circles if ever. Oh well, some other time nalang.

3. I've been a one woman show/team since the start of the week and it's going to be this way indefinitely; other team members are on core and sick leave. I don't want to jinx it but so far things are relatively manageable. Well surprisingly. Don't get me wrong, there's still a ton of work to do; probably enough to last our team until next year. And of course, there are still issues - old and new alike but I remain unfazed. Buti nalang talaga kebs ako otherwise high blood na ako ngayon.

4. You can't please everyone. There will always be haters. Whatevs to haters. Bleh :P

5. I'm  going to be incognito this weekend. Read: invisible and unavailable.  

6. No more follow-up questions. Heck, I was just trying to be nice/polite bordering on T.H. na nga eh. Be a man. Step up on the efforts otherwise I'm already gone. Poof.

7. I don't want to force it. I don't want to try too hard anymore. I'm just going to leave it to the forces of nature. Steady lang. Go with the flow pa rin.

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Sometimes it's better not knowing. Sometimes having too much info will confuse you even more or worse, hurt you. Ignorance is bliss. 

Texting 101

Monday, August 31, 2009

Don't you just hate it when someone texts you - those (a) short and close-ended kind of texts or (b) those out of the blue fyi/self-centered/narcissist kind of texts? And just out of courtesy/politeness, you still reply; not to forget that you had to rack your brains out just to think of a reply. I mean how/what else am I going to reply to (a) "Hey!" or "Good Morning" or (b) "Good morning, I'm going to go swimming today" other than (a) Hey! or Good Morning lang din and (b) Good morning, so what? Sana kasi may follow up man lang na "How are you?" or "What are you doing today?" or "Have a nice day" diba? Labo dudes. As in. So now the textee pa ends up having to make all the effort to keep the text going. Of course, you don't want to come off as aloof or nagfee-feeling din diba?

The biggest catch is, if you do reply, either all you get is another lousy close-ended text or sometimes, you don't even get a freakin' response! Go figure. I mean it's just so bomalabs lang talaga. Why text in the first place if you have no intention whatsoever to make conversation? It's a total waste of time. What's the point? I don't get it. Geez luiz.

Kinesthetic

Friday, August 28, 2009

It was my turn to take my 1st step. I guess it was more of something that I had to do rather than something that I wanted to do. Anyways, it's officially over and done with now. No pressures. No overanalyzing thoughts. No nothing. 

So where do I go from here? Beats me. I'm going with the flow for now.

"Everything happens for a reason. Every action has a reaction. Always remember that what is meant to be will have a way to come about."  

- Anonymous - 

Promise

Monday, August 24, 2009

I finally found the song that I've been looking for. It's a Pinoy song; by Yeng Constantino. Really nice, I super like. It isn't exactly a sad song. Listen to the lyrics.

Post August 21

Sunday, August 23, 2009

The long weekend is over...

I can't wait to get back to work tomorrow. Woohoo.

Now that's the spirit.

Ha! Yeah. Right. 

Random Thoughts

Friday, August 21, 2009

1. It feels like a Saturday today. Wala lang. Feel ko tuloy Sunday na tomorrow then back to work na ulit. Duh! Hehe.

2. Clarisse and I did some spring cleaning this morning. Mind you, the spring cleaning we did wasn't the usual spring cleaning of our room or closet, hehe. So the target of our spring cleaning is - enter drum roll please - our refrigerator! Our refrigerator is now free from junk. Well for now. I'm sure my dad's going to be really happy about it because he has been nagging us about making ourselves useful to the household, hehe. Who knew we had a ton of chocolates in our ref? Have you ever taken a look at what's in your refrigerator too? You'd be surprised.

3. I finally got to watch G.I. Joe. Finally! I've been wanting to watch it for the longest time - since last year pa and I think everyone watched it already; everyone but me. Astig siya. It did not disappoint. I liked it waaaay more than The Time Traveller's Wife. I was never a fan of those cheesy going back in time movies. Read: If Only, The Lake House and P.S. I Love You. But P.S. I Love You was memorable for me...

4. You know what's hard? It's hard to miss someone who's just around. Damn it.

5. Tomorrow's the day; not unless I'll have to postpone it again for some unforeseen reason. I'm going to be all kebs about it. No expectations. No nothing. I don't think I'm ready but I guess it's going to do me more good than harm so go nalang ako, steady lang. Quesara sara!

Sunday, August 16, 2009

And I crush you so...Sam Milby :) 

Ice Cream and Basketball

Monday, August 10, 2009

It's a miracle that I was able to ignore the Haagen Dazs ice cream bar on the fridge. Phew success! Hehe. I gotta give myself a pat on the back. I super love ice cream. Mahirap deadmahin ang ice cream talaga for me - all the more if it's Haagen Dazs! Waaaah.

On a side note: The next ADMU-DLSU game is next Sunday na daw? For real? Labo naman dude. Re: last night's game, La Salle surprised everyone by showing up and playing big last night. Coming into the game, everyone's already probably thinking tambak. Myself included hehe. I guess it just goes to show that anything is possible if you will it. You gotta strive hard. You gotta have that "Never say Never slash Never Give Up slash Never Say Die" attitude. Konting sipag at tiyaga lang and of course, everyone's gotta be a team player. Sayang lang we lost but really good game nonetheless. Galing pa rin!

Movie Dates

Saturday, August 01, 2009

I heart Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds. I've always been a fan of Sandra Bullock. I like her beauty - simple and natural; no frills, no fuss. Ryan Reynolds, on the other hand, is really charming. And can I just say that he has a really hot hot body? Lean and tight. Oooh la la. I heart him na. I watched The Proposal last night. Hehe obvious. It's been a while since the last feel good movie I watched. This one I like! Everyone enjoyed it too. Nice.

Next off my movie list: Katherine Heigl and Gerard Butler's The Ugly Truth and of course, G.I. Joe na next week!

And oh...August na! Wow bilis. I must say I'm feeling very positive and hopeful. I'm trying to change directions and so far so good. I'm on track pa naman. Steady lang ako hehe. Lots of things to look forward to! I'm off to Guam this Sunday night. It's my first time so it's something to look forward to na rin plus some time for the 3 R's again hehe.

Random Thoughts

Thursday, July 23, 2009

1. I'm craving for Pocky Crush - a recent discovery from our HK trip. Shucks, I should've bought more. I bought 4 boxes only. Yum yum.

2. Kobe is in Manila. Astig! I saw him on TV Patrol last night. I wish I was at his workshop also. That Salva (or was it Silva?) Ateneo player guy was lucky ah. Hmmm...if I were a guy, I would've bought all of Kobe's shirts! Coolness.

3. Finally! A win for La Salle. Whether it's over Ateneo or UP, a win is still a win. ;)

4. I felt bad for saying NO. I wanted to help but sometimes, I just have to draw the line. I can't keep on helping others if I don't help myself first. My boss had my back on this one. This one's a long story.

5. Supalpal na naman ako kanina. Poor management skills talaga. I was so biting my tongue not to make laglag the other person. So conyo ba? Lol. This one's another long story. Buti nalang work is just work.

6. Will our trip to Guam two weeks from now push through? Do I still have enough leaves? Haha kebs!

7. I'm super looking forward to watching New Moon! Can't wait, can't wait.

8. I'm also looking forward to watching G.I. Joe and Iron Man 2. HP sucks. Haha, not that I watched it already. I have no plans whatsoever. I want to watch The Proposal also. I want to watch a feel good movie. Now na.

9. Okay fine, jologs na ako but The Wedding on Channel 2 is kinda cute and interesting. Derek is really cute. Zanjoe grows on you. Try watching!

10. My cousin's wedding pictures are really beautiful, the nicest so far. Their video was not bad also. Galing. No need for Jason Magbanua na pala eh. In fairness to my cousin and his wifey, they're both photogenic and they're both good at projecting. Wow model! Hehe.

11. Friday na tomorrow. Yey! All together now, T...G...I...F!

12. Out of sight and/or touch = Out of mind. I'm already starting to forget - including how it feels like. It's lesser of everything now.

21 Guns

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Do you know what's worth fighting for

When it's not worth dying for?

Does it take your breath away

And you feel yourself suffocating?

Does the pain weigh out the pride

And you look for a place to hide?

Did someone break your heart inside?

You're in ruins

One, 21 guns

Lay down your arms

Give up the fight

One, 21 guns

Throw up your arms into the sky,

You and I

When you're at the end of the road

And you lost all sense of control

And your thoughts have taken their toll

When your mind breaks the spirit of your soul

Your faith walks on broken glass

And the hangover doesn't pass

Nothing's ever built to last

You're in ruins

One, 21 guns

Lay down your arms

Give up the fight

One, 21 guns

Throw up your arms into the sky,

You and I

Did you try to live on your own

When you burned down the house and home?

Did you stand too close to the fire

Like a liar looking for forgiveness from a stone?

When it's time to live and let die

And you can't get another try

Something inside this heart has died

You're in ruins

One, 21 guns

Lay down your arms

Give up the fight

One, 21 guns

Throw up your arms into the sky

One, 21 guns

Lay down your arms

Give up the fight

One, 21 guns

Throw up your arms into the sky,

You and I

UP!

Saturday, July 18, 2009

When you hit rock bottom, there's nowhere else to go but UP. Positive vibes lang. Filter the negative noises. I'm already feeling better days ahead. Steady, steady, steady...

Baby Steps

Thursday, July 16, 2009

I'm already getting better at this everyday - slowly but surely.

Dad

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

I'm thankful for my dad. I'm a lot more like him.

UAAP Season 72

Sunday, July 12, 2009

It's that time of the month again. UAAP season na naman! There's at least something to look forward to in the next couple of months. I'm definitely going to stay tuned to the games despite La Salle's rookie laden team. Anything goes with college basketball naman so I'm keeping my fingers crossed that La Salle's going to make it to final four at the very least. Although I have graduated for 4 years already, I still enjoy college basketball. Nothing beats cheering for school pride. I love the hype and excitement. I love the sort of festive atmosphere. Win or lose, animo La Salle all the way! 

HSH

Saturday, July 11, 2009

It feels so good to be back in Manila. There's no place like home. I miss my bed!

NO to Violence

Tuesday, July 07, 2009

People, supposedly adults already, who resort to physical violence have really serious issues - anger management, psychological issues, psychiatric even. I believe they have to seek help ASAP before they start spiraling out of control and end up losing it all together. These people are ticking time bombs waiting to explode and self-destruct. Read: SELF-DESTRUCT. I don't want to be anywhere near them when it happens. How can you even stop them when they've already lost all logic, reason and sanity? Physical violence in any form should not be tolerated. Tolerating it will not do any good to the person. If any, it only encourages the person to continue his/her self-destructive ways. I tell you it'll only do more harm. Avoiding the problem will not solve anything at all, it'll only make it worst. Nakakahiya man aminin pero kung iyon naman ang totoong nangyari, why twist the story? Why do I have to cover for someone else's wrong doings? I cannot for the life of me understand how some people would want to physically hurt another person. Having just the intention to physically hurt another is so inhumane. Serious schizo tendencies dude. It really scares the hell out of me. I've never ever felt like wanting to inflict physical pain towards another person no matter how angry or frustrated I am, not even if I am the aggrieved party, not even in the worst case of scenarios. Except for self defense, there is absolutely no excuse and reason for inflicting physical pain towards another person. It is by all means unacceptable, whichever side pa man you look at. How can you possibly justify physical violence? The answer is simple. You can't. Most importantly, you don't.

P.S. We all have our crosses to carry. If you're miserable, deal with it. Please leave me out of your misery.

P.P.S. Ang magalit, pikon! Ang pikon laging talo. Bleh! :P

Love Shots

Monday, July 06, 2009

I would like to share an email I received from someone I previously worked with...

The hardest part in life is not by loving, but by forgetting the one you learned to love.

Isn't love just like shooting stars?

Love, like shooting stars, so beautiful and special. Rarely does it come; in fact, some people, if they see one at all, see it only once in a lifetime. Because once is actually more than enough. The beauty and the thrill, the happiness, last a lifetime. Just like shooting stars, it happens too when you least expect it. Often, at the corner of your eye, and it never happens at that point in the sky where you are staring. You have to be quick enough to catch it because they move so fast.

So don't look in one spot too long...open your eyes. Because when you finally decide to take your eye out of that one spot, it might be too late.

Lastly, both love and shooting stars take time. Love is patient (Corinthians 13:13). You don't see shooting stars at once. Most of the time, you have to be looking up the sky quite a long time before you actually see one. BEFORE THE RIGHT ONE COMES ALONG. Because of the millions of stars, a few shoot. And, sometimes, yeah, it IS enough to stare up the sky and see the little diamonds...but shooting stars really take the cake.

"Love has its time, season and own reasons. You can't ask it to stay, you can only embrace it as it comes, and be glad that, FOR A MOMENT in your life...it was yours."

"Love, no matter how hard you try to find it, you won't see it. No matter how hard you try, you won't get it. But when you are about to give up, it comes."

Soon we will all find our shooting stars. Isn't it sad how some people's grip on their lives is so precarious that they'll embrace any preposterous delusion rather than face an occasional bleak truth?

Ouch....

Sigh will I still get to find my shooting star? I seem to always strike out when it comes to love. Haaay I gotta be patient. I still believe my turn will come - in God's time...right place, right time AND most importantly, the right guy for me.

It's Over

Sunday, July 05, 2009

That sure was one hell of a wake up call. Yikes. I was super turned off - that's even an understatement. I'm speechless. It hurt more than anything else. I guess this is exactly what I have been waiting for. Fullproof reason - backed by logic and common sense. How much more crap do I have to endure to say 'enough is enough'? I deserve so much better. When do I say it's over? You leave me with nothing to hold on to anymore. Pack up na. It's time to move on. There's no turning back now. You've lost me already and this time it's for real. I hope you're happy now.

'09 Halftime

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Whoa the 1st half of 2009 is officially over. Read: O-V-E-R. Whatta year it has been so far. Life threw tons of curve balls my way. Needless to say, 1st half was really tough on me. It didn't go as I wished it would or as I hoped. The only up side now is there's still the 2nd half to look forward to. Therefore, I resolve to forgive and forget about the 1st half and its entirety. Poof! Erase, erase, erase. Pretty much like my laptop, I gotta start defragmenting and emptying the recycle bin. I'm not going to look back anymore. There's nothing much I can do now. It's all in the past. I can only move forward and make the most out of what's left. I'm not really expecting for a fancy or hip and happening 2nd half. All I want is a steady 2nd half. Nothing more, nothing less. I want to be positive and hopeful going into the 2nd half. I'm not going to cry over spilled milk anymore. I don't want to think too much. I don't want to worry too much about the future. I don't want to dwell on the should have, could have and might have been's of the 1st half. So with that said, let's get ready to rumble este let's get the ball rolling. It's game on!

Injured

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

I saw the sign and it opened up my eyes. I saw the sign. It wasn't what I was hoping for but it is what it is. I don't want to make lame excuses or rationalizations; neither am I going into defense or denial mode because it would only make the whole 'asking for a sign' process utterly pointless. I asked for a sign, I waited and I got it. It was make or break for me, the moment of truth. To me, it was a simple choice - either you want to or you don't. Yeah there must be some kind of explanation. There's always an explanation, right? For a while there, I almost felt the sincerity. I wanted to believe. Albeit injured, I was putting on the bravest face that I possibly could. But yesterday morning was just all too much to bear. Why did you have to add salt to the injury when it hurt like hell already? Sadness.

Rigodon

Monday, June 29, 2009

New floor plan at the office. New seating arrangements. Kinda new neighbors. Semi new environment. There's a different feel to the workplace - for now. Sort of like transferring to a new house. Yeah that kind of feeling.  Hmmm....I kind of like the newness of everything.

I'm so welcoming any change at this point. 

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Acceptance is key.

Test

We both failed our tests. But at least, we have our answers now. Loud and clear it was.

Upgrade

Saturday, June 27, 2009

I'm finally making the switch. No more looooooong start ups and shut downs. No more computer hang ups. No more anti-virus updates. No more crashes. Hopefully it's as good as it's supposed to be.

With 2.8 Ghz Processor, 500 GB Hard Drive and 4 GB Memory, say hello to my brand new Macbook Pro! Me like.

Special thanks to my mom and dad. Loveeet. :)

Breathe Slow

Friday, June 26, 2009

I'm running out of patience
'Cause I can't believe what the hell I'm hearing
And speaking of hell, it don't compare to this heat
That I am feeling

I love you too much, it shows
All my emotions go out of control
Good for you, bad for me
When I can hardly see from the tears that flow

Can't forget to breathe slow
Count from one to ten with my eyes closed
'Cause ladies take it in and get composure
Before I lose it get composure

I am gonna breathe slow
Count from one to ten with my eyes closed
'Cause ladies take it in and get composure
Ladies never lose composure

Not gonna lie or even try
You've got my wheel spinning
And I ain't the one to shoot the gun
'Cause that means you will be winning

I love you too much, it shows
All my emotions go out of control
Good for you, bad for me
When I can hardly see from the tears that flow

Can't forget to breathe slow
Count from one to ten with my eyes closed
'Cause ladies take it in and get composure
Before I lose it get composure

I am gonna breathe slow
Count from one to ten with my eyes closed
'Cause ladies take it in and get composure
Ladies never lose composure

Somebody better hold me back
You're lucky, I know how to act
So lucky I ain't gonna attack

I'm being calm and cool
But believe me you, it's taking everything to just breathe
Breathe, breathe...

Untitled

Thursday, June 25, 2009

I lost my transformers date. :(

Maybe this is the sign that I've been waiting for?

I probably got my sign now.

Maybe it's time to move on. No turning back.

It feels like there's nothing left to hold on to anyway. If the person doesn't care anymore, why even bother?

I'm not going to bother anymore. I don't even want to take a crack at friendship for now.

Sigh, all good things do come to an end....

Typing Maniac

I am now hooked on Facebook's Typing Maniac. It's like the return of the Typing Tutor - with a twist!

Now...if I can only get this laptop of mine to work faster. Grrr...nasisira momentum ko eh. Hahaha. As if.

LSS

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

I'm currently addicted to these 2 songs right now...

1. Kelly Clarkson's Already Gone
2. Alesha Dixon's Breathe Slow

Sad noh? I know.

At least it has a nice tune to it.

SL

I've been sick for the last 2 1/2 days already. Hirap din magkasakit ah. It's no fun because you pretty much can't do anything at all. I'm immobilized by the lack of energy thereof. Moreso, all the (A)H1N1 news is making me a tad bit paranoid. My dad too seems paranoid because he's constantly checking up on me with my meds. No cause for alarm though because I'm feeling much better today. It must be the ice cream I had at last Sunday's buffet. I think I had too much ice cream. My sister says takaw tingin daw kasi ako, tsk tsk tsk. What can I say...I can't say no to ice cream. There's always room for dessert lalo na for ice cream! Hihihihi :D So ayun...too much ice cream = itchy throat, non-stop coughing, clogged nose, aching body and slight fever (i.e., I feel hot). Well the fever part, we haven't really established yet. Since my mom is out of the country, no one actually knows how to read/interpret the thermometer; although my sister claims she knows how hehe. As per my sister, the thermometer reads 37.4 with a disclaimer that we might have to change the thermometer because this one that we're using might be broken already, lol.

Anyways, I think I'm okay now but my dad says I shouldn't go to work pa rin tomorrow. In as much as I think I have to get back to work already, I still have to get clearance from my dad. I got into trouble before for going to work despite my being sick and my parents telling me not to go to work. Martyr daw! Hehe so we'll see...

Trivia: Have you ever wondered why the color pink for the Metro? Pink is used by MMDA to signify that the city is in the pink of health. So there...may reason naman pala. Ay sush hehe.

Knocked Down

Saturday, June 20, 2009

"Sometimes love comes around and it knocks you down.

Just get back up when it knocks you down."

- Keri Hilson's Knock You Down (feat. Kanye West and Neyo)

Moving Forward

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

From Gossip Girl's Valley Girl Episode...

"No one has all the answers and sometimes the best we can do is just apologize and let the past be the past. Other times, we need to look to the future and know that even if we think we've seen it all, life can still surprise us and we can still surprise ourselves."

Limits

Why do I even bother?

Maybe at some point, I should just stop trying.

Got 2 Believe

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

I just have to open my mind, listen to my heart, and believe that love is (still) out there...

Usi

No more stalking. It's unhealthy. Haha.

Tired

Monday, June 15, 2009

Sometimes I care too much.

Damn it.

Mondays

Sunday, June 14, 2009

"If the week passed didn't end up the way you planned it, remember...

GOD created Saturday for you to unwind, Sunday to recharge, and Monday to start anew."

Ang bilis ng long weekend. Monday na naman. Happy Week Ahead! :)

Kebs Notes

1. Less expectations = Less disappointments. No more expectations for me. I'm only setting myself up for more disappointments. Kebs na ako. Bahala na.

2. Less talk = Less trouble. Not unless it's something that I feel so strongly about, I should just zip it. As per experience, it's just not worth the trouble. Kebs.

3. Less comparison = Less stress and discontentment. So what if someone else is prettier, smarter or doing better than I am? I'm no superwoman but surely we all have our own strengths and weaknesses. Our basis for our success should not depend on how well others did - as often is the case. Our efforts will never be good enough because someone's bound to be bigger, better and brighter. Kebs to the world. MYOB dapat. We are our own benchmarks.

4. Less emotions = Less hurt. Better to detach and stay unaffected nalang. Basta back to being kebs!

5. Sometimes it's better to NOT know nalang. Sabi nga nila, ignorance is bliss. So kebs it is.

Me Chillax

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

I'm so looking forward to the long weekend; not that I have anything exciting planned though. Wahaha.

Matter of factly, I'm so looking forward to chilling at home lang. Catch up on some of my tv shows AND! finish Breaking Dawn na. I just started last week and so far it's keeping me glued. I was kinda bored with New Moon and it took me several months to finish Eclipse. I must say, nothing beats Twilight pa rin. I've started reading again so that should be a positive thing, right? Next up on my list are Blink, The Tipping Point and Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell. Reading is kinda like my pause button now. It temporarily keeps my mind off overanalyzing and overemotional thoughts.

I'm also going to train for badminton. So yey! I can't wait to play like a pro na. Er, too ambitious. Like a regular nalang muna. Hehe.

I also plan to resume my driving lessons. So another yey! I have to focus on my reverse and then parking! Sana tuloy tuloy na. Although I'm pretty sure it'll take 10 years of practice before my dad will ever let me drive as in drive.

Thank God for the long weekend. Yey to the Nth power Yey! Hehe OA.

Despite the rough road ahead of me, I realize that, at the end of the day, I still have a whole lot more to be thankful for and that is what matters.

Unfinished Past

I stumbled upon an unfinished entry saved as draft. As per the date/time stamp, I wrote this last 10/04/08, 8:35 PM...

There are doubts and uncertainties - definitely. I often worry and think too much about the future; not knowing where things will go from here.

And now that I finally have enough courage to make a decision...

-----------------------------

I can't remember the specific circumstances surrounding the abovementioned thoughts; although I do recall having felt the doubts and uncertainties. Anyhow...I never really had the courage - then. It was only recently that I was able to muster enough courage to actually act on it. It wasn't a spur of the moment kind of decision. I think I had valid reasons now; unlike before, nothing made sense at all - logically speaking, that is. Nonetheless, it still wasn't an easy decision to make. It was still something that I had to push myself to do. I'm having mixed and confusing emotions right now. Albeit it did give me some sort of relief in the sense that I didn't have to deal with it anymore, I also feel sad and disappointed that it has come to this. I believe in my heart that we are waaaaaaaay better than this. Ganun talaga siguro pero no regrets sana. I don't think I can ever be certain about the choices I make. Doubts and uncertainties still fill my heart and thoughts. I can only hope for better days ahead.

Stuck Again

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

You've got to get yourself together. You've got stuck in a moment and now you can't get out of it. Don't say that later will be better now. You're stuck in a moment and you can't get out of it.

And if the night runs over. And if the day won't last. And if your way should falter. Along the stony pass. It's just a moment. This time will pass.

Rainbow

Monday, June 08, 2009

Sometimes, maybe we just have to condition our minds and/or hearts to get used to that painful feeling, that unwanted change, that uncontrollable circumstance, that broken promise, that bitter truth, that sad reality or that disappointing ending. And eventually through time, wounds will be healed and we will be okay again.

Even if there is pain now

Everything will be alright

For as long as the world still turns

There will be night and day

Can you hear me?

There's a rainbow always

After the rain

The rain is pouring real hard on my end right now. I'm still waiting for my rainbow to come. I'm hopeful. Still hopeful. I don't want to force or rush things. No pressures. In God's time right place, right time. I'll just have to keep the faith for now.

Positive Vibes

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Positivity begets positive results. Note to self: Gotta start filtering the negative noises. Life is too short to be angry or sad.

Overload

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

(1) I want a break. (2) I need a break. (3) I need a time out. I just want to drop and forget everything and focus on myself first - I need some "ME" R&R&R. Really. I want to start fresh. I don't want to worry about work issues and deadlines. I don't want to worry about life and the future. I just want to hit the pause button. As per the suggestion of an officemate/friend, why not just hit the abort/delete button? Actually pwede rin hehe.

And coincidentally, my horoscope agrees with me...

Working Circles

Saturday, May 16, 2009

There's a ton of lessons to be learned from working in the world of corporations. You learn so much about life. You learn so much about others. And more importantly, you learn so much about yourself. To sum up one of the lessons I've picked up...

"Your daily surroundings are currently changing. Perhaps your circle of friends has already undergone a major change. The fact is that you no longer have so many prejudices about the people you meet, and no longer seek out only a certain type of person as a friend. You accept whoever comes along. You may not realize it, but your attitude is completely different now from what it once was."

After 4 years of working outside, my views/thinking have changed - in the positive direction - tremendously.

That should be good for me, right?

First Love

Thursday, May 14, 2009

"Love can be an ugly, confusing and complicated affair practiced by fools. It'll trample your heart and leave you bleeding on the floor. And what does it really get you in the end…nothing but a few really incredible memories that you can't ever shake. The truth is, there's gonna be other guys out there. I mean, I hope. But I'm never gonna get another first love. That one is always gonna be him. And I won't have it any other way."

Why do some love have to end?